What about a situation where the person never actually existed? In my dream, there was incredible unity because of our Simcha (joyful celebration). The particulars may have changed, but the basic story line remained the same: I became pregnant, went through a birth, was granted a healthy child, and participated in the ensuing celebrations. I feel the pressure of having to say goodbye before I'm ready. BTW, if anyone needs to fill out a “My Life Planning Workbook”, I found a blank fillable form here: I don't even remember that I adopted her I feel she is mine and always was with me. I have never been preganant, and my husband is not sure he evern wants to have children.They existed only in my visions of what I wanted for myself, but not in flesh and blood. The last time I felt this pressure that was when my grandfather, ob"m, passed away. I didn't have a choice; I had to say goodbye on that early fall day. I also saw some decent tutorials on how to fill it out. My only comfort is knowing that one day when I am in Heaven, I will have all the children that I wish for.

i kiss dating goodbye pdf-5

I have dated men who no longer want anymore children, but yet they want grandchildren. SO I NOW HAVE THREE LITTLE DOGS WHICH ARE NOW MY LITTLE BABIES.

I am glad that I found someone else (you) who has/had these feelings inside of them - but I am also conflicted because I feel your pain and wish that I could take your pain away. I had so much disappointment ivf miscarriage you name it. As he gets older he at ten has said thank,you for,taking me in. THERE IS A SAYING YOU NEVER MISS WHAT YOU NEVER HAD BUT COMING FROM A WOMAN AND THE ISSUE AT HAND HAVING A BABY I THINK IS EVERY WOMAN'S DREAM.

I feel blessed that I am able to have my dreams of my "children" even though I probably will not meet them here on Earth. TO HAVE A LEGACY TO LEAVE BEHIND A SMALL IMPRINT IN THIS BIG WORLD.

I'm saying goodbye in the hardest situation possible ... I won't even be able to pray for their souls because they never existed. Or maybe the Master Plan was that I helped others create life and I will meet those souls who will recognize me as part of their heritage. I am going through that exact issue right now and it's nice to know I am not alone.

Maybe, at some future date when God reveals His Master Plan, I will meet all of these souls and will realize that indeed I was somehow able to create life. Thank you for writing such a touching and meaningful article.

I have been fighting these feelings since 1996 and refused to have any children (biological or adopted) unless I was married to a man who could help me raise a child or some children. AFTER TRYING FOR SO LONG AND THEN GETTING PREGNANT ONLY TO FIND OUT THAT I WAS PREGNANT IN MY TUBE. I HAD SURGERY AND THE DR TOOK OUT THE WRONG TUBE WHICH LED TO A VERY LONG DRAWN OUT RECOVERY NEEDLESS TO SAY THAT NOW I HAVE NO TUBES AND ONE OVARY LEFT AFTER ALL IS SAID AND DONE.

Unfortunately I am 45 yrs old and now the time has passed. SO I KNOW WHAT IT FEELS LIKE WHERE ALL MY FRIENDS HAVE CHILDREN EXCEPT ME.

But what happens when the person is no longer there? and I even allowed myself to dream about their wedding. These children of my dreams brought home gorgeous artwork from school that I hung on the fridge. In His infinite wisdom, He's decided that it's time to say goodbye to the children I will never have. I have a strong conviction that my role as a jewish woman is to bring more yiddishe children into the world. I am scared that each year as I get older and past my child bearing days.

On the other hand, I can always call or send an e-mail, so saying goodbye shouldn't be so hard. It is detrimental to my physical health to continue to try but I can't come to grips with giving up hope. I have prayed for this one thing ever since I was a little girl, and it has not come.